So its been a while since I last blogged about anything. I
think perhaps I have been too preoccupied with “life” and dealing with all its
joy and agony.
So a couple of weeks ago I went on this date with a guy I
met online, again. We started chatting on the Saturday and he sounded really
cool. He sounded a bit more intelligent than the rest and for once he was not
interested in getting into my pants. He was adamant that he is not looking for
sex and that he wants to find that special one. We are the same age and turns out
we went to school in the same area and we basically knew the same people so
there was lots of catching up. So on the Sunday he was in the area and I
invited him over for coffee. Naturally it was a bit uncomfortable but the
conversation was not flowing same as it was when we chatted online. It felt
very strained and very awkward. I was used to this by now as it generally does
happen like that on the first “date”. He was a fairly good looking guy, dark
hair blue eyes, a bit skinny but not anorexic at all. The bonus was that he is
a high school maths teacher which means that the guy has more than two brain
cells.
So anyway he stayed for couple of hours and then left. We
watched Sherlock Holmes, the second one. Note to self, not a good idea to be
watching a movie on the first date. You really don’t interact with each other
and you focus more on the movie. Instead of talking to each other you make
small talk about the movie which really does not tell you anything about the
person. He left and sent a very sweet message about how he enjoyed meeting me
and that next time I should come over to his place for a movie and a cuddle.
This was rather positive and cute I must say and I was very flattered. The chatting
over text was rather positive but again it was more involved then it was
earlier in person. Nonetheless I did not really stress about it yet as there is
still potential at this stage.
So during the week we chatted every day and there would be sweet
messages back and forth saying “Hope you have a great day” and so on, but then
things started turning a bit weird. I got a message asking about my “size” and let’s
be clear he was not asking about my shoe size, although apparently the two are
related. Immediately I was a bit annoyed with him and thought to myself that
this dude was just as bad as the rest. So the week went on and by Wednesday we
made plans to meet up on the Thursday again. Now however he was asking if we
can make out on the Thursday. My immediate thought was that this guy can go and
take a hike but as I have been told in the past that I am too full of crap I thought
I should give it a go. Thursday came and I really did not feel like going but
again I forced myself.
I got there and he apparently does not live alone. He has a
very young very cute room mate who as it turns out is also gay. To be honest I was
more into the room mate, physically, than into Mr Teacher. The three of us sat
there drinking wine and making small talk. I was really not enjoying the
conversation as it was mostly about the back stabbing and fights in the gay
world and the roommate had some relationship with a married guy… been there
done that. Eventually the roommate went to bed and then Mr Teacher started
getting frisky. He was clearly drunk and I was not which is never a good idea. We
moved from the couch to the bedroom where things were even weirder. No toys or
kinky stuff but just weird. He made the weirdest noises and facial expressions
and I was really not feeling the vibe. Needless to say that the whole event did
not last very long and I was so relieved when it was over. I grabbed my clothes
and got dressed in record time and on the way to the car he was saying he feels
bad and that he feels drunk. I could not say goodbye fast enough and get out of
there. Let me be very very very clear, that old saying of “bad sex is still
better than no sex” is absolute bull shit. Bad sex is bad, period, and its
really not worth the attempt.
The next day he was rather apologetic and said he never does
things like this, which I simply do not believe. The guy is clearly an operator
and from what I gathered during the conversations with the roommate this was
not out of the ordinary. Then soon after that he begins again with wanting to
know when I am I coming over again and he can’t wait. There is only one reason
he wants me over there and its not for the sparkling conversation. I withdrew
from the situation and gave him very open ended answers. Eventually I got a
message saying “oh so I guess we are not seeing each other again” to which I replied
that he should stop feeling sorry for himself and we will see what happens. At
this point I was very annoyed and not interested at all.
So here is where my thinking is at right now. He
misrepresented himself from the start and he is basically no better than the
rest of the gay sluts out there that just want one thing from you. Well he got
the one thing he wanted. After my last message to him I have not heard from him
again and I am not bothered one bit, in fact I am very relived. My therapist
suggested that I sent him a message saying how I felt but I actually don’t think
he deserves an explanation from me.
I know I deserve better than this and I know that I am a
great catch. Most of my friends tell me that I am full of crap and too
selective but should I drop my standards and just fall for the first guy, who
wants to get into my pants, I think not! We all deserve to be treated with
respect and to be loved unconditionally and Mr Teacher was never going to be that
guy.
Right now I am just so not in the mood for the dating game
and have actually taken a break from dating and the online demon where all the
freaks and perverts hang out. I need to focus some time on me and stop worrying
about why they would be interested in me. They should make an effort to make me
be interested in them…
So good riddance Mr Teacher and hope you find what you’re
looking for.
